Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Yes, your opinion matters ... But not to me.
You know it`s a good night when you wake up with gum in your bellybutton.
Just because I`m awake doesn`t mean I`m ready to do things
Wouldn`t it be great to revive the old "Mutual Of Omaha`s Wild Kingdom" show, but with a new setting? Like a WalMart Store in Kentucky?
Guys if a woman shaves hers legs she wants you to touch them..... You just have to make sure she knows You.
If you want a successful relationship, find someone who likes the same thermostat setting that you do.
Let me be honest, I dont even walk a mile in my own shoes.
I can update Facebook from anywhere. Even when crossing the stre
My parents never allowed violent video games. Just family-friendly board games with questions like, "Who murdered this guy with a pipe?"
If I owned a copy shop, Iād only hire identical twins to work there.
I`m paying my taxes with a smile, but they wrote me back saying they want cash.
You really are the cat`s pajamas, and by that I mean you`re a stupid idea.
Me: Mom...Dad. I`ve decided to live on my own from now on. Parents: ok, cool. Me: Your luggage is outside
Some people are just beautifully wrapped boxes of crap.
The exam hall is the only place on the earth where everyone is desperate for teamwork..