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I do whatever the little voices tell me to do.
Hey, I found your nose. It was in my business.
At the end of the day, life should ask us, ‘Do you want to save the changes?’
Hey pigs, stop trying to swallow entire apples. You keep dying!
Ever since I installed Adblocker, I have been severely depressed. Hot singles in my area are no longer interested in me.
Bipolar smile :(: ...... Gets um everytime !
I`m glad the guy who came up with "No means no" didn`t do the whole dictionary
Spread happiness by smiling at a stranger today, or flash them your boobs...... Strangers love boobs!
"Let the chips fall where they may." -My kids when they`re eating chips on the couch.
Which emoticon indicates the desire to cover someone with fire ants?
If someone asks for advice, just tell em to follow their heart. No idea what that sh!t means but at least they`re not talking to you anymore
Autocorrect changed "you`re so wise" to "you`re so wide", and now I need to find a good hiding spot before my wife comes home.
Yes, I used to "dance like no one is watching"; at least until Google Earth sent me a certificate for ten free lessons.
Youth is wasted on the young.
This ad says: "3 out of 5 smokers die" Apparently the other 2 become immortal.