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Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!

That urge you get to write “No one gives a crap” on someone’s status.
There is a fine line between “hobby” and “mental illness.”
I worry about people who write "taken" in their bios. Where did they go? Who took them? Why aren`t we helping to find them?
Yes I walked away mid-conversation. You were boring me to death and my survival instincts kicked in.
My wife and I decided not to have children. The kids are taking it pretty hard.
No one ever said life was easy, but several people did say that you were.
If you were born in September, it`s pretty safe to assume that your parents started their new year with a BANG
Miley Cyrus and Justin Beiber were both answers on Jeopardy tonight. The end is near........
Stole a cart from this woman at Walmart today. I like to think of it as playing grand theft auto suburbs edition.
Who decided that we should sit together in groups while we chew food?
Clapping: Repeatedly high-fiving yourself for someone else`s accomplishments.
when I`m quiet, strangers look at me and think I`m shy. People who know me think: OMG! he`s thinking! EVERYBODY RUN!
Girls, dont read this please: Hey guys, isn`t it funny how our wives/or girlfirends really think that we care what they did that day? lol.....it never gets old.
This drag race is not at all what I expected. Are they in dresses inside of the cars, at least?
My dream job would be the Karma delivery service.