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Transformation Tuesday! Throwback Thursday! Flashback Friday! Never underestimate a woman`s ability to find a reason to post a selfie.
Cauliflower is just broccoli ghosts.
My train of thought likes to circle around the station a few times, take some wrong turns, and end up totally lost.
I can`t wait for a empty Christmas wrapping paper tube to bonk someone over the head with!
loves infomercials, but claiming that a product promotes weight loss when combined with diet and exercise is like claiming it grants wishes when used with a leprechaun.
There may be no excuse for laziness, but I’m still looking.
169 is still a sex position, but with a creepy guy watching.
Car horns were invented 1% for safety and 99% because people get pissed off sometimes and need to let a mofo know.
I wonder what my dog has named me?
If you watch the Twilight movies backwards, Kristen Stewart still can`t act.
If "The Breakfast Club" were made today, it would be a silent film about 5 kids staring at their phones.
My bank called because they noticed ‘highly suspicious activity’ on my charge account. It was for a gym membership.
If your phone gets wet, try putting it in a bag of dry rice. At night the rice will attract Asians who will fix your phone for you.
I read somewhere that we only use 10% of our brains. I wonder what the other half is for?
If you try to fail but you succeed which have you done?