Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Just so you know, the movie "Life of Pi" has nothing to do with dessert.
i honestly hate saying sorry but when i do i really mean it :-)
I cant remember the last time i forgot something
The good thing about being tall is, you can`t get lost in a crowd. The bad thing is, you can`t get lost in a crowd.
The WWF advert asks, “When the ice goes, where do the polar bears go?” ... Well, swimming, I suppose.
I do 5 sit-ups every morning. No, it doesn`t sound like much, but there`s only so many times you can press the snooze button.
Definition of insanity - Doing the same thing over and over again expecting different results
Waking up everyday seems a little excessive.
I named my dog "5 Miles" so I can tell people, "I walk 5 Miles every day"
You`ll never see me on Hoarders because I can`t afford that much sh!t.
The only beachfront property I`ll ever be able to afford is a sandcastle.
I may be wrong, but I doubt it.
A part of me wants to go on a diet and eat healthy. Sadly that part of me is a liar.
B!tch, please! You`re so fake, even barbie is jealous of you
Ice skating is just walking in cursive.