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Salad tastes pretty good once you add some pizza and get rid of the salad.
Delete cookies? Why on Earth would I want to do that?! I LOVE COOKIES
Oh look, it`s raining outside. I think I`ll go on Facebook and update all my friends that don`t have a window of their own.
people live & people die, but in the the end we still get high.. so if in life you dont succeed, F*CK it All & smoke some WEED ?
Why do guys go to bars to meet women? Go to Target. There`s like 10 women to each man and they`re already there looking for things they don`t need.
Relax, youβre not paranoid at all. Everyone is talking about you.
My husband and I are having a serious fight. Do you think I should let him know about it?
Roses are red. Monsters are green. Just look in the mirror. You`ll know what I mean.
i make the other half of the Oreo watch.
Why do I get the feeling that a lot of adults nowadays who ask kids "What do you want to be when you grow up?" are just trying to come up with some ideas?
Some people are just pure evil...I should know because I`m one of them.
I would like my FB friends to know that the opinions and comments I make on FB in no way reflect the actual thoughts, opinions or actions of me, or my family. Its all for fun. The only posts that I actually mean are the same ones you agree with.
When life gives you lemons....throw them back and yell, "I wanted cookies!"
You may think I`m a loser, but to my goldfish, I`m the god of flakes.
If something`s worth doing, it`s worth doing rihgt.