Mobile App Coming Soon - Daily Silly Status

Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!

I`m sure the fellow below don`t have big feet :(
Went to the bookstore to pick up a "Where`s Waldo" book today, but couldn`t find any. Well played Waldo, well played...
Two Best Advices For Safe Life : 1. Always Speak The Truth, No Matter How Bitter Harsh It Is ... 2. Run Immediately After Saying It..
I just got kicked out of the Zoo! How was I supposed to know that real hippos don`t actually eat marbles?
Marriage counselling: Because sometimes your wife needs to hear from a professional that she`s being a bitch.
Don`t worry, some people are their own punishment in life.
If monogamy is sex with only one person, what is origami?
I was going to LIKE and compliment your FB pic, but I`m not a good liar.
Talk to me long enough and you`ll realize why I`m single.
Never scratch your a$$ with chocolate on your fingers.
It`s Sunday or as I like to call it, "No pants day".
Whenever i see a facebook page Celebrate; "We have reached 200K fans". I just ask myself, do they know how many of those 200K died or left facebook or can`t remember their password after they liked the page?
Dear Fork, I understand that we haven`t spoken since I ran away with dish, but I thought you should know that you have a son. His name is Spork. He has your hair. Sincerely, Spoon
Dear women at Walmart with 6 screaming kids: if your wondering how that box of condoms got in your cart.... Your welcome!
I wouldn`t want to fly Virgin. Who`d want to fly an airline that doesn`t go all the way?