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Does the sleeve tat go with my male pattern baldness and pot belly? Asking for a friend.
My workout plan really only consists of me wandering around in parking lots because I forgot where I parked...
Roses are red, this much is true, Violets are purple, not f*cking blue
Apparently beer contains female hormones. After you drink enough you can neither drive nor shut the hell up
You`re the reason why I believe in condoms.
If you like counting to three, you are going to love parenting.
Sometimes, I send game request just to piss people off :)
The new Jungle Book movie might be confusing to today`s kids who don`t remember when we had jungles. Or books...
I like how the nice people of Sesame Street all know that Oscar the Grouch lives in that can, and yet they still stuff their trash into it.
I have heard of women that aren`t crazy, but I`ve also heard of Unicorns.
I`d engage you in a battle of wits, but I`m afraid you`re unarmed.
Well, I`ve officially entered the, "Why did I come into this room?" phase of my life.
Is there anything more awkward than when you are singing along to a song on youtube and the music stops loading.
My rabbit died yesterday… Now he’s just some bunny that I used to know…
You ever notice “q”, “p”, “b” and “d” is the same letter but with a different angle.