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In my head I sound like the Queen of England bitches!
You Are The Reason My Middle Finger Was Created.
If you feel down because you had a bad day! Chin up! Tomorrow is another day and the worst has yet to come!
A fun gym game is to drag your treadmill behind someone else`s, and then run with a determined glare while holding a bat.
Wake up, kids! Bees can`t even read, much less spell. IT`S A SCAM!
"I like your tree`s earring." ... "That`s a tire swing."
Your a$$ must be jealous everytime sh*t comes out of your mouth.
I`m just like the ghostbusters, except I chase squirrels around my neighborhood with a vacuum cleaner
Jodi Arias dating O J Simpson now that would be a hell of a relationship
Some people want a perfect relationship. I just want a cheeseburger that looks like the ones in commercials.
Okay, enough procrastination. Time for excuses.
Hey, sorry I`m late ... I didn`t want to come
I bought the world`s worst thesaurus yesterday. Not only is it terrible, it`s terrible.
A father is someone who carries pictures where his money used to be.
roses are red violets are blue da shit in my back yard looks jus like you