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I`m 28 years old, but in marriage years, I`m dead on the inside.
I`m on this great new diet called "sleep through breakfast"
Iām classically trained in the art of Nintendo.
Was asked what I look for in a relationship. Apparently, "A way out" wasn`t the right answer...
whoever snuck the `s` in fast food is a clever person
Who me? Oh I`m just waiting for my husband to apologize for something I did wrong...marriage is fun
boss- "You cant drink while your at work!" .. me- "Oh dont worry im not working!!"
YOU KNOW WHY!!!!!!!!!!
Are the unmarried employees at Kraft known as the Kraft Singles?
I think the Worst Part about admitting you are an Alcoholic ..is People expect you to Quit Drinking.
"I want to marry a smart, rich, and beautiful woman. But I don`t feel like getting married 3 times." - Hesam Ebrahim
It`s a small world, but I wouldn`t want to paint it.
was going to argue with you...but then I remembered I really didn`t care
I now have more electronic screens in my life than friends.
My penis was in the Guinness book of World Records. Then the librarian told me I had to take it out before she called security.