Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
I try to explain to my kids during the movie that in reality, even a cowardly lion would eat a girl and a little dog.
The grass may be greener on the other side but at least you dont have to mow it.
9 out of 10 doctors will agree that 1 out of 10 doctors is an idiot.
People say there are plenty of fish in the sea, well that is nice and all but Iβm human, I donβt date fish.
People who talk to themselves tend to be better lovers. Did you know that? Yes, I did know that. Thank you for asking.
It`s not their fault, per se, but at some point, Crayola has to be held responsible for continuing to make crayons nostril-width.
Why is it that most nudists are people you don`t want to see naked?
When two people love each other deeply, nothing is impossible. Except deciding on where to eat.
Facebook: Wasting peoples lives since 2004
Come on. Let`s all go and be happy in front of some miserable people
Itβs only Wednesday and Iβm 95% done with this week.
Dr. Oz says having 1/2 hour of sex is equivalent to running 6 miles. I guess I`m going to the gym today.
Well, well, well. Guess who the grocery store asked to come back soon.
My biggest problem is that I believe almost everything I tell myself.
I`d rather be someone`s shot of whiskey than everyone`s cup of tea.