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No I don`t think you`re stupid, I just think you have real bad luck when it comes to thinking
What does it mean if the Holy Water sizzles when it hits your skin? (asking for a friend)
That awkward moment when you try to zoom in on Instagram and remember that you’re an idiot.
I`ll never understand why single women waste so much time on dating websites when there are so many eligible bachelors right here in this adult bookstore.
I found $40 in my jeans. The kid in me says "Buy dart guns and candy", but the adult in me says "Buy vodka, dart guns and candy".
"Three blind mice" is probably the most popular nursery rhyme about animal cruelty
I imagine a world where whining on Facebook is illegal.
I got this weird condition where I drink a case of beer and fall down.
Why would you be scared to get Ebola? You haven`t left your couch since 2011.
If Apple really want to introduce something new and "innovative" they should just release a longer charger.
Sorry for nicking your car with my door, but you didn`t leave much room. It`s small, but I circled it with my key so you could find it.
They say that alcohol kills slowly. So what! Who wants to be in a hurry?!?
I hate to rub it in, but lotion doesn`t really work otherwise.
Stop leaving me messages. If I ever wanted to talk to you again, I wouldn’t have borrowed all that money.
Good thing I`m judged on my actions and not my thoughts.