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Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!

According to a recent study 52% of women have used vibrators....I`m guessing the other 48% have new ones?
One thing`s for sure when I shower with my boyfriend. My titties are spotless!!
I`m in the awkward time period between not wanting to have pants on, and having to wait for the pizza guy right now...
I may not be the smartest guy in the world, or the richest guy in the world, or the best-looking guy in the world, but,....Oh,hell. Now I`m depressed.
Β΄s status message is better than yours
What do you mean this posting of the BBQ ribs you made is not an invite?
The speed in which a woman says β€œnothing” when asked β€œwhat’s wrong” is inversely proportional to the severity of the sh!tstorm that’s coming.
My favorite Yoga Pose is the Upward Facing Couch Potato.
Their bedroom door is closed. I better walk in there for no reason. - kids
Step aside coffee, this job is going to take hard liquor.
I think it`s about time Taylor Swift wrote a song called "Maybe I`m the Problem"
Depresso; the feeling you get when you`ve run out of coffee.
The man who created the Thesaurus has died. He`ll be fondly remembered, commemorated, memorialized, recalled and recollected.
Since joining Facebook, about 8 aggressive lampposts have walked up to me in the street and punched me in the face.
Facebook should make it to where it says, `Went from being in a relationship` to `Problem solved.`