Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
People need to stop putting flyers on my car. I don`t want to see a band called "Parking Violation" at the "Courthouse"
I run entirely on caffeine and inappropriate thoughts.
Do gun manuals have Trouble Shooting sections?
Whoever determined that a 1-inch candy bar should be called "fun sized" should really re-evaluate their standards for entertainment.
I`ll do a lot of things for money, but I draw the line at working...
If I had a time machine I`d set it to "back in the day", just to see what everyone is talking about.
I love asking little kids what they want to be when they grow up because I`m still looking for ideas.
Where is the "Made In China" labels made?
Made the decision that I`m done having kids. Yet every morning I wake up and there they are asking me for breakfast.
Somebody needs to teach opportunity how to use a doorbell.
Just tried to put my seatbelt on ... at my desk ... I`m pretty.
You know you`re getting old when Happy Hour is a nap.
I wasn´t born with enough middle fingers to show you how I feel
I have noticed that everyone who is for abortion, has already been born.
Research is what I`m doing when I don`t know what I`m doing.