Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Ended a relationship today. Don`t worry, it wasn`t mine.
Could you please put your screaming baby on vibrate.
Today would be a great day to leave a note on a random car that says "I know what you did".
People say that marriage is a job...marriage is not a job, its a hobbie!! Dating while you`re married...that`s a job!!
Chili for breakfast. Cause I hate my Co-workers.
The funniest thing about this Facebook status is by the time you realize it doesn`t say anything important, it`s to late for you to stop reading it ... sucker
I put my head between my legs and lean forward.....thats how I roll
If life is unfair to everyone, doesn`t that make life fair?
The boss said I should let my creative juices flow. What he doesn’t know is that my creative juices are vodka and cranberry.
Help keep America beautiful. Stay in your house today.
All those years of getting horrible elementary school pictures was just society`s way of preparing you for your driver`s license photo.
If you don`t like the way I drive then get off the hood of my car.
The one who laughs last is the slowest. The one who laughs first has the dirtiest mind.
status uploading
Shout out to the single lady I saw buying a bunch of Duracell batteries on Valentine`s Day.