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What does Miley Cyrus have for dinner on Christmas? Twerky :`)
I`m not much on seizing the day, I just kinda poke it with a stick.
Urgh..I just dropped my phone, are you guys alright?
So many feelings today. Mostly hunger.
If you never used that plastic thing that keeps pizza from sticking to the box lid as GI Joe`s poker table you`re too mature for me.
At least thirty percent of my workout is spent picking a different song.
My dog is worried about the economy because Alpo is up to $3.00 a can. That’s almost $21.00 in dog money.
My favorite thing about naps is that I don`t have to talk to people during them
"This is so wrong," I say excitedly, my heart racing, my hands trembling as I butter a donut
I regret buying that straight jacket now. I thought it would look good on me but I just couldn`t pull it off...
Candy Crushers keep inboxing me saying that they need "lives" as if I didn`t already know that.
If I ever get off this couch, I’ll be unstoppable.
I try not to limit my madness to March.
Dear autocorrect: at no point have I ever meant “ducking.”
"This is so wrong," I say excitedly, my heart racing, my hands trembling.. as I butter a doughnut