Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
If you’ve ever used Urban Dictionary to compose or decipher a text, congratulations, you`re over 40.
Screw Folgers, the best part of waking up is knowing I survived last night`s drinking.
If there`s one thing that I`ve learned it`s, that I should have learned way more than one thing.
Flies only live for 24 hours.. Except for the ones that get in your house. Those bastads live forever.
Valentines day
I inject vodka right into the orange. Screwdriver-to-go
Cats have been named the #1 pet held hostage by lonely women.
You are intriguing. You require further stalking, sorry I mean investigation.
"I don`t care if you think it sounds gross, that`s what we`re calling it" -Guy who named the sweater.
Relationships are like bathrooms. I`m in them a lot longer than I need to be, probably cause I`m playing on my phone the whole time.
My husband woke up this morning with a HUGE smile on his face. I love Sharpie markers.
Its not you, it`s how you don`t make me sandwiches.
That awkward moment when you’re laughing so hard, you accidentally hit your head on something..
Try Zumba, It`s awesome ... on my way to the emergency room.
Lasagna is just spaghetti flavored cake.