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I bet Waldo`s parents are worried sick.
Apparently, the answer "I Know" is not a good answer when your friend tells you how good his girlfriend is in bed
They keep saying the right person will come along, I think mine got hit by a truck.
Life is not a garden so quit being a hoe
For a minute there, I thought I had just wasted 60 seconds...
Don`t ``Wine and dine`` me ... ``Champagne`` me ... step it up a notch
You haven`t really made it until people start using your name as a verb.
If by angry birds you mean flipping off a$$holes while driving then yes I`m at the expert level of Angry Birds
Ever been in the middle of writing a great post and think, did I just run someone over?
How do we know that all the ancient Greek sculptures aren`t just victims of Medusa?
Water is the most essential element of life, because without water, you can’t make coffee.
Im out like a fat kid playing dodge ball
Remember when you were a kid and all you would use the computer for was paint and space pinball?
In order to avoid hating myself in the morning, I sleep till noon.
I don’t know who or what is doing it, but one day I will find the thing that continues to steal one sock and destroy it.