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Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!

It`s Friday! High-five some sh!t!
It’s amazing how little information I need on someone before I decide I don’t like them.
Some people should be very grateful I don`t have mob connections.
I think my guardian angel drinks.
Stress from children can take 10 yrs off your life Drinking alcohol from stress can take another 10 yrs Based on my math, I died 5 yrs ago
I followed my heart...now I`m at the liqour store
Have you ever had a fly or small bug land on your computer screen and your first reaction is to try and scare it with the cursor?
The only part I like about doing laundry is saying I`ve got a big load
You’ll never be as young as you are now.
I have no interest in skydiving. I get enough of an adrenaline rush hoping my debit card goes through.
If I drop my food on a plane, and we change time zones at the same time, do I receive an additional hour to the 5 second rule?
Can you find the the mistake? 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10. Click Funny if you did..
I hate people who take drugs......like the police.
I am so clever sometimes I don`t even understand what I`m saying.
I want to meet the guy whose complaint led to cashiers asking me if it`s okay if they put the receipt in my bag.