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I don`t know which is worse... waiting for someone to get out of the bathroom so you can use it or hearing them say "come in" when you knock on the bathroom door...
Is there anyone called Phillip here? I found your screwdriver.
School taught me a lot of stuff, but the most useful was how to get ready in 15 minutes
+ if you wish you could record your dreams.
Thanks to everyone for the Birthday wishes! To anyone who missed it.”No cake for you!!"
"This place needs to be sticky, wall to wall." - Every 2 year old with a Popsicle.
A woman at my gym has a jellyfish tattoo on her arm ... So I peed on her
I`m not a Dr. or a Nutritionist, but I`m pretty sure the worst thing you can put into any high fat/ high calorie dish is your fork.
FACT: Every zoo is a petting zoo, if you’re brave enough.
It doesn`t matter if the shoe fits or not, I`m still shoving it up your a$$.
Like a stoned man once said, I can`t remember.
TRUE FRIENDSHIP: Walking into a persons house and your wifi connects automatically.
I wish my bank account refilled as fast as my laundry basket.
Sweating is for people who do stuff.
If we all had to wear a warning label, what would yours say?