Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Life is beautiful ...... but Monday`s suck all the way around.
For all of you who gossip about me: Thanks for making me the center of your world.
That moment when you offer somebody a sincere compliment on their mustache and suddenly she`s not your friend anymore
Must be my day for Mis-Advertizing --- I just ate a Bowl of Cheerios ----- and they DIDN`T make me Happy!!!! FML!!! :-P
They say you`re not supposed to go to the grocery store when you`re hungry. It`s been several days now, what should I do?
Ladies, life is short. So buy the shoes!
I`m not sure what my credit score is but I`m pretty sure I`m losing.
The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement.
The difference between cheating on your wife and cheating on your taxes is if you tell the truth, the IRS still wants to f*ck you.
I sooo did not want to go on a run today but those cops came out of nowhere.
Knock knock... whos there? Cows go... Cows go who, No, cows go moo
Gone insane. Be back Tuesday.
You know you drank too much last night when you have to use google maps to locate yourself the next morning.
The only solution to a problem is to find the source and Kill it.
So red or white wine with hamburger helper?