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If you keep doing what you´ve always done, you´ll keep getting what you´ve always gotten.
All the women moaning about finding a husband obviously never had one.
I`m getting all dressed up. Have a feeling I might be on COPS tonight.
When people with multiple personality disorders are about to die, whose life flashes before their eyes?
Live in the moment. Unless the moment sucks. Then live on Facebook.
It has been scientifically proven that any woman can be satisfied with only 3 1/2 inches — and it doesn’t matter if it is Visa or MasterCard
Keep your marriage fresh by writing each other love notes like "I considered smothering you with a pillow last night but didn`t."
I`m not sure what my credit score is but I`m pretty sure I`m losing.
Don`t do drugs. Become a Pop star and they give `em to you FOR FREE!
I am not judging you...I already decided I don`t like you
In grade school it’s called bullying but when you get older it’s referred to as upper level management.
Is it the S or the C that`s silent in scent?
Here’s a little bit of advice for you.. advi
I don`t get why people say "They were busting their ass"? Wasn`t it already cracked to begin with?
Serious question: Are doctors sure erectile dysfunction isn`t just a side effect of being married & bangin the same woman for years & years?