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A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are looking into it.
is about to stick a pin in your voodoo doll... brace yourself.
Thanks to whoever made electrical outlets look like tiny screaming faces trapped inside my walls I can`t make eye contact.
You can`t fix STUPID, but you can Numb it with a 2x4.
I had four E`s and LSD last night. Such an awful start to a game of scrabble!!
if I was a bird, I know who I´d poop on first.
Hey all you parents who recently named your kid Jax, We get it you`re unoriginal and watch SOA ... Hold on my daughter Grey`s Anatomy is crying.
Just been wondering what "please Do Not Touch" would be in Braille
If by "help decorate the tree" you mean drinking beer on the couch yelling out everything you`re doing wrong, then yeah, count me in.
I told my family that I never want to live in a vegetative state, dependent on some machine and fluids from a bottle…So, they got up, unplugged my computer, and threw out my wine.
I`ve just woken up, and it appears that Earth is temporarily safe from harm & currently doesn`t need my assistance, so I`m going back to bed.
I hate it when I see some old person and then realize that we went to school together
I may look calm, but in my head I´ve punched you in the face 3 times already!
My school always awarded dictionaries to the spelling bee winners. Which was weird because it should actually be awarded to the losers.
Kissing a sleeping woman in an animated Disney movie is romantic but do it on a bus and the judge doesn`t agree.