Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
If you keep doing what you´ve always done, you´ll keep getting what you´ve always gotten.
"I really should buckle down and get my rap album going"-Me, every time I drink
Apparently sleeping your way to the top doesn`t mean dozing off in meetings or taking naps in the copier room.
No matter how old you are ... swingsets are cool.
Ever notice that people who spend money on beer, cigarettes and lottery tickets, are always complaining about being broke and not feeling well?
I should never have climbed into this vat of curdled milk. I`m in whey over my head.
i wonder if fish get thirsty .
I`m that friend that you have to explain to people before you introduce me and apologize about afterwards.
Why did the Fresh Prince have to take a cab anyways? How sh!tty was that family that no one would pick him up from the airport?
It`s a bird.. it`s a plane..no wait..it`s a blade of grass....
Remember, time is more powerful than You!!! One tree makes a million matchsticks......But when the time comes........Only 1 match stick is needed to burn a million trees......
Nothing says "I`ve already given up on this day" quite like a Taco Bell breakfast.
I just don`t think a partridge in a pear tree would make a great gift
Ain`t no sandwich when she`s gone.
I don`t like morning people ... Or mornings ... Or people.