Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Karate is just a violent way of making people smell your feet.
Some people should be very grateful I don`t have mob connections.
I have this talent of getting tired without doing nothing.
anyone celebrating anything today? Anything at all... doesn`t matter what. I just need something to drink to.
I`m just going to start wearing a shirt to work that says "I`m good, thanks for asking."
"I get knocked down, but I get up again, You`re never gonna keep me down" ~Bowling pins
I hope Breaking Bad ends with Jesse waking up from a dream in the middle of Mr. White`s chemistry class.
It`s so expensive being a woman. I know because I have financed a few.
Easy come, easy go describes my last 12 cases of beer and 17 relationships.
Two things you can always be certain about when it comes to women: 1) They`re always cold. 2) It’s somehow your fault.
Whoever decided to color underpants white was an idiot.
The realization that Netflix knows me better than my closest friends....
My mom told me to follow my dreams. So I took a nap.
When ever I think about the past...It brings back so many memories
I may be asking too much of this coffee.