Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Why are people sad when potatoes can be cooked in like 200 ways?
Idk what was worse, the fact that my girlfriend text me saying “sorry breaking up with you” or that a minute later she text me back “sorry wrong number.”
My wife is so annoying. "Do you think I`m sexy? Am I hot? How gorgeous am I? Do I have a nice ass?" I just want her to answer me.
Ironically, Internet was made to save our time.
Warning!! Today I will be coloring OUTSIDE the lines..
No one needs a vacation from me more than me.
You’re never too old to learn something stupid.
MERRY CHRISTMAS!
Dating a stripper is like eating a noisy bag of chips in church. Everyone looks at you in digust, but deep down inside they want some.
Plot twist: name your pets after passwords.
Life`s too short for Salad..............
One day I shall rule the World! Until then, I`m going to bed
I twisted my ankle playing vodka last night.. Next question
Love your neighbor. But don`t get caught.
Keep your friends close and your enemies tied to a train track.