Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
According to my neighbor’s journal, I have boundary issues.
I’m having some vision trouble today. I can’t see myself doing anything.
Why insult someone when you can say something nice in a very sarcastic tone.
Unless you fell off the treadmill and smacked your face, nobody wants to hear about your workout.
It`s not difficult to tell crocodiles and alligators apart. One will see you in a while whereas the other will see you later.
If this cold snowy weather doesn`t clear up soon, I may never get in the mood to take down the Christmas tree-
The scientific theory I like best is that the rings of Saturn are composed entirely of lost airline luggage.
Next time you’re asked “What’s Up” respond “A delightful animated film about a young boy and an old man who fly away to an exotic place in a balloon house.”
Renewed my "Man Card" today, by going out in the cold, drizzly weather to cut firewood. In other news, police are investigating sightings of a chainsaw wielding maniac in the my area. I hope the catch that nut job!
The best curve on a girl is her smile ;) ... Lol just kidding!
If wookies have a 400 year life span, then Han Solo is basically like Chewbacca`s third dog.
I’m not a schizophrenic… At least, that’s what all the voices tell me.
You know you are the ugly one if they ask you to take the photo.
According to this BMI chart ... I am to short.
No, PornHub, I would NOT like to share this video with my friends and family on facebook.