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It`s called "Biscotti" because nobody would buy "chocolate covered croutons".
Why is it so hard to find a woman who loves me for me and not the person I lied and manipulated her into thinking I am?
Your call is very important to us. Please enjoy this 40 minute flute solo.
I left work in slow motion but it didn’t blow up behind me.
Why does toilet paper need a commercial? Who is not buying this?
Note to self: don’t set your password reminder as “you should know this”
My face is a 4, my personality is a 6, so basically, I`m a 10.
I`m already getting into the Thanksgiving spirit, I`ve given the bird to lots of people today.
Dating a single mother is like pressing continue on some one elses saved game
I hope that man who was walking in memphis found out the way he really felt
You can either agree with me, or you can be wrong.
I wish I loved anything as much as rappers love female dogs and gardening tools.
ATTENTION: Upon further consideration, I am once again pushing back the debut of my summer beach bod. Thank you for your patience.
Apparently a teen in Brazil died after jerking off 42 times without stopping. So incase you were wondering. ...41, guys,...that`s the limit.
Liam Neeson trained Batman, Obi Wan, and Darth Vader. He is both Aslan and Zeus…and he punches wolves. Why would you kidnap his family?