Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Sometimes, you can just tell it`s gonna be a "does not play well with others" kind of day.
It’s always hard to explain puns to kleptomaniacs because they’re always taking things literally.
Want the truth? Just ask a kid.
I have an irrational fear of speedbumps… but, I’m slowly getting over it.
I hope I die alone. I mean, you`d have to be a pretty big jerk to hope others die with you.
If my body was a car, I`d trade it in for a newer model. Cause everytime I cough or sneeze, my radiator leeks and my exhaust backfires.
The more photos you have to untag, the better the weekend was.
exercise........you mean extra fries
I want to know what horrific ideas were rejected before they decided "Vagisil" was the best possible brand name?
Why does McDonalds call it a drive thru when you have to drive AROUND the building?
You ever want to just grab someone and say, WTF is wrong with you?
Days that I don’t have to care about my appearance are my favorite days.
If you love something, set it free. If it immediately bites your throat and drags you up a tree, you love a leopard and should try to escape.
Whoever said paper beats rock is an idiot. Next time that happens, I`m gonna throw a rock at them while they hold up a sheet of paper.
Sometimes you just see a post and think, "Yup it`s your own fault."