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Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!

Can`t wait to be full of Christmas beer! I mean cheer. No, I definitely mean beer.
I`m at my most judgmental when standing behind someone in a buffet line.
How many men does it take to open a beer? None! It should be opened by the time she brings it to the couch.
WARNING!! I have character defects and I`m not afraid to use them.
Where 5 minutes becomes 5 hours. Facebook.
"I like your tree`s earring." ... "That`s a tire swing."
I think it’s funny when dogs hide under the bed when they’re scared. I’m like β€œyou idiot, that’s the first place monsters go!”
In order to get my teenagers attention I shut off the WiFi router and wait for them in the room it`s in.
I wish I could get excited as a redneck drinking cheap beer and watching cars go around in circles for hours.
The trick is not let anyone know how really weird you are until it’s too late to back out.
I say the things better left unsaid.
I had a bit of a lazy day sitting in my underwear looking for jobs online. My boss was furious.
awesome collection!
In life you will meet all sorts of people, happy, moody, shy, loud, weird, and then there`s me So deal with it mmuhaaaaaaaahaaahaaaa that`s right !
Would buy you a drink but I would be jealous of the glass.