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Kiss me I`m Irish, put a little tongue in it, I`m French too
I was laying down, looking up at the stars while I was writing this post. Then it dawned on me; `Where the heck is the ceiling?`
Hi, welcome to adulthood! You`ll be constantly tired except for right before you need to go to sleep.
for some reason my plans to workout never work out
I’ve never considered myself much of a conspiracy theorist. Then I discovered the letters in Frito Lay could be rearranged to spell Oily Fart- Coincidence?… I think not!!!
I dont want to sound like a badass or anything but I play Wii without the wrist strap on....
The good thing about "poking" on Facebook, no babies are created.
If the river were beer and I was a duck, I would swim to the bottom and never come up..
I`d do anything to lose 20lbs. Well, except for eating healthy or working out.
I don’t know who decided that high heels were just for women but…GOOD CALL.
My swear jar has more money in it than my bank account.
Sometimes just to annoy my therapist, I ask him, "So how does my lack of progress make you feel?"
Sorry, Mr. Homeless Guy, here’s the story. I’m in college. I work part time and I can only support one of our alcohol problems.
I can`t seem to convince these dogs & cats that I don`t need their assistance in the bathroom.
Worst part about getting a phone call is the 12 seconds you can’t use your phone as you wait for it to stop ringing.