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I might not be a great example, but I´m one hell of a good warning.
Remember when double entry was an accounting term?
Why does toilet paper need a commercial? Who is not buying this?
I don`t need to go to church in order to feel ashamed of myself on Sunday morning.
This morning I got in touch with my inner self. And that`s also the last time I`ll buy cheap toilet paper...
Respect your elders. They made it through school without Google and Wikipedia.
Why is there Head & Shoulders shampoo? Who has hair on their shoulders? Who`s shampooing their shoulder hair? ... please come forward.
Being an adult is basically a "choose your own adventure" book, but every choice sounds terrible.
I paid attention to the construction signs and got in the correct lane. You ignored them for miles and now you want me to let you in. Not gonna happen.
Any person can be nice to my face, but it takes a real friend to be nice behind my back.
Life`s most terrifying 10 seconds: Being held hostage in the corner of the shower by cold water.
My kids will be mad at me when they discover it isn’t illegal to talk in the car while I’m driving.
Cookies and porn are always better when they`re homemade!
Saw these three things on a corner, in this order: Liquor store, gun store, bank. What could possibly go wrong with that?
I can’t remember ever being told I’m a bad listener