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It`s real cute how pedestrians confuse "right of way" with immortality.
Sometimes I pretend to be normal. But it gets boring ... so I go back to being me. ;)
u smile i smile u laugh i laugh u cry i`ll go get a bat and say who`s gonna get it
Itβs a little sad that todayβs youth donβt get to experience a red rubber dodgeball to the face like we did back in the day.
Next time one of your friends leave their Facebook open, randomly pick one of their friends and like all 973 of their photos.
Bad things happen to good people, so I`m pretty sure we`re all safe
Dear Fruity Pebbles: Calorie content w/out milk is unnecessary. Anyone shoving dry Fruity Pebbles down their throat isnβt counting calories.
I`m old enough to remember being the tv remote.
If only someone on the internet would give me their opinion on the election.
Saying a prayer for all the turkeys today. Also the single people with concerned relatives.
With my eyes. That`s how I roll.
Whenever I see a woman breastfeeding in public, my first reaction is to get in line.
roes are red violets are blue he`s for me not for you if for any chance you`ll take my place i`ll use my fist and smash your face
When I "rage against the machine" the machine is usually a printer.
Why can`t we just change the spelling to fit the way it sounds: Bologna = Bolony Lasagna = lasania knife= nife tsunami = sunami politician = a$$hole