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My dad taught me righty tighty, lefty loosie.... that`s why I never dated left handed chicks.
After visiting the gov`t healthcare site, I don`t know why I was so worried about their ability to spy on me...
As long as everything is exactly the way I want it. I`m totally flexible.
Save time. See it my way.
You said you wanted my advice, but I see you haven’t f*cked off or died yet.
If you`re not employed by the Secret Service, there is absolutely no reason to have a Bluetooth on your ear.
Thinking " What would happen if the whole world farted at once and a person lit a lighter?"
I self medicate, therefore you live.
That awkward moment when kids see a toy they want on TV but the can`t get it because their parents must be 18 or older.
How come they didn`t call this years game the BUD bowl?
When I was a kid...no wait, I still do that.
If "Cops" has taught me anything it`s to stay away from people with blurry faces, they`re nothing but trouble...
Success is like a fart. It only bothers people when it`s not their own.
If you`re going to stalk me at least notice when I`m running low on toilet paper & change the roll.
Research is what I`m doing when I don`t know what I`m doing.