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The difference between “like” “love” and “in love” is the same as the difference between “for now” “for a while” and “forever”
It doesn`t matter how old you are, If you hear the ice cream truck jingle you jump out the window for that sh!t.
I try to live my life by the saying: “You scratch my back and I’ll let you know when to stop.”
While most people are becoming older and wiser, I´m becoming older and better at making stuff up as I go along.
Save time. See it my way.
It must really suck to take life so seriously that you can’t enjoy it.
Why is it that when you work very hard, you say you are working like a dog? Every dog I`ve ever known is lazy and sleeps 16 hours a day.
Everyone has a purpose in life ... Perhaps mine is finding things to bitch about.
Tomorrow is Valentines day, a holiday that comes along once a year to remind you that if you don`t have a special someone...I guess your alone.
Hey Guys! I havent seen you since last year!(;
Lust is not real love and Tombstone is not real pizza, but both are fine when you`re drunk.
I self medicate, therefore you live.
"That`s too much bacon." -Nobody ever
Sure, I`ll show up at your Halloween Party... I`ll be coming as the invisible man....
All these years and I still don`t understand why they didn`t put Kevin Bacon in Grease.