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All I`m saying is that the cheese grater wouldn`t have 4 sides if they wanted you to wash it after every use.
The Bible is pretty accurate...Especially when thrown at close range.
"We`re pregnant!" -people who don`t understand science
Keep the dream alive......... Hit the snooze button.
My husband is not allowed to help with math anymore. Apperently 4 = 6.5 in his reality.
Note to self: When sending Valentines messages don`t use group text next year.
Always love a woman for her personality. They have like ten so you can choose.
WANTED: Someone to follow me around and whisper "You`re an adult" every few minutes.
A gay man is just one colonoscopy away from foreplay
How does anything ever get done at the bubble wrap factory?
The last time I went to a nude beach I got a ticket. The officer said I was applying my sunscreen...Too Fast.
You may think I`m a loser, but to my goldfish, I`m the god of flakes.
This healthy diet thing is dangerous. I just cut myself peeling an apple. This would have never happened to me with a twinkie.
I need to find a woman that loves me for my money....but doesn`t understand math. (<>..,<>)
I think a clear conscience is really just memory loss