Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
If Plan A doesnβt work, the alphabet has 25 more letters. Keep calm.
Friends are like boobs... Some are real some are fake.
Things were said. Feelings were hurt. Your car was set on fire. My point is youβre wrong & Raphael isnβt the best Ninja Turtle. Get over it.
"Probiotic" sounds a lot better than "bacteria infested"
Not sure if my dog is barking for no reason or Iβm about to be murdered.
Just used the "f word" over on FB so I`m waiting for the villagers with their torches, axes, whatever those people use.
Who knew rock bottom was so crowded?
Shhh! Shhh! Shhh! Shhh! Shhh! Shhh! Shhh! Shhh! Shhh! Shhh! Shhh! Shhh! Shhh! Shhh! Shhh! Shhh! -Librarians arguing
Sorry I kept stopping erratically. I was pumping SCREW YOU in Morse Code with my brake lights.
If God is watching us, the least we can do is be entertaining.
I used to care ... but I take a pill for that now.
i m not totally useless, i can b used as bad example
Some people come into our lives & leave footprints on our hearts. Others come into our lives & make us wanna leave footprints on their face...
Well I just finished up some spring cleaning. Holy crap, owning a Slinky can be such a hassle.
If you were dating an FBI agent and you broke up, they would be your fed ex.