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You never realize how boring your life is until someone asks you what you like to do for fun.
I spend 95% of the time out of bed wishing I was back in bed
I just let my mind wander, but it didn’t come back yet.
Really discouraging that there`s still bald people in sci fi movies.
I`m not mental, other wise the rubber duckies would have told me by now...
McDonalds ... closing thigh gaps since 1967.
I get as much action as a white crayon.
My love is like a candle, If you forget about me, I`ll burn your frikin house down!
What if , one day you randomly wake up and realize that you`re whole life was just a dream.
I still sing my ABC’s to see which letter comes first.
What ? Who ? Exactly my point. Now move along and go read something else. Nosey !!
I hate when the remote is way over there
You sure do seem to know a lot about love and relationships for someone who spends 22 hours a day on Facebook.
I guess I`m somewhat of a big deal, when I tell people about my accomplishments, they always say, "Big deal."
You know that little thing inside your head that keeps you from saying things you shouldn`t? ... Yeah, I don`t have one of those.