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Who needs dance lessons when you`ve got alcohol?!
The 21st century. When deleting history is more important than making it.
Never do anything that you wouldn’t want to explain to the paramedics.
Somewhere in America, a woman has a baby every 47 minutes. We`ve got to find this woman and stop her!
Home sounds like a nice place, until they say they’re going to put you in one.
I got in touch with my feminine side today... I made myself a sandwich.
Jogging backwards because I`m trying to gain a little weight
More people would call the Gambling Addicts Helpline if they made every 5th caller a winner.
Life Tip: Hang out with people who make you forget to look at your phone.
My daughter exclaims "Cheers!" before she takes a drink of juice. So no, actually, I am NOT looking forward to parent - teacher conferences.
one day a man seen a fairy, and asked.... could you make me irresistible to all women.... so she turned him into a credit card. :`D
They should just block cell phone service in movie theaters. Problem solved.
This debate episode has to be the craziest Celebrity Apprentice I`ve ever seen!
I got in touch with my inner child and the little sh!t hung up on me.
come on people driving is just like coloring, just stay inside the lines.