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I`m boycotting Kix cereal because of all that kid testing.
"I`d like a bowl of soup please." "Any sides?" "I hope so, or it`ll go EVERYWHERE."
If you can`t handle me at my worst...I don`t blame you, neither can I.
I remember, once upon a time... for about 2 seconds... about 13 years ago... I almost gave a damn.
I have an alcohol problem, in that I can`t afford any.
My apartment is so dirty that I actually lost my last girlfriend to the 5 second rule.
m for Monday t for Tuesday wtf Wednesday Thursday Friday get it wtf
I once saw a forklift lift a crate of forks. It was way too literal for me.
God knew that there would be times that a single middle finger wouldn`t be enough.
That`s disgusting! (unless you`re up for it?)
I was about to do something awesome, again, but I told myself “Enough is enough, that’s plenty of awesome for one day”
One fun way to describe Facebook is “imagine you are a mind reader in Walmart.”
If you walk a mile in my shoes the least you can do is leave a pair of yours to wear.
In my day we had to roll the windows up and down with our bare hands.
Facebook is the reason why my work is not done.