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Sometimes Google should just come back with a message that says "trust me, you don`t want to know."
i never said i knew what i was doing, i said i was going to do it anyway :)
when girls say bye .......... may be it means buy something for her.....
I got this new calorie counting app ... Every day I go for a new high score ... Winning!
Is "blowjob" one word or two words? God I hate writing thank you cards. -Bfanch
Before McDonald`s I bet "don`t buy cheeseburgers from a clown" was a pretty hard and fast rule.
If my psychiatrist said "There`s really nothing more I can do for you", that means I`m cured right??
The only difference between a weekday and a weekend is which boss is telling me to do things.
Only a few years ago, the average parents had four children. Nowadays, the average child has four parents.
Sometimes I wake up grumpy but sometimes I let her sleep instead..
U make me wish I had more middle fingers
I`d hit that. - women drivers
Forecast for tonight: Alcohol, low standards, and poor decisions.
"Are you even listening to me?" is a weird way for my girlfriend to start a conversation.
If my ceiling fan could hold my weight, I`d never be bored again.