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"Probiotic" sounds a lot better than "bacteria infested"
Roman Numerals...what are they good IV?
In all my years, I have never finished a pencil.
I walked a girl home last night, and things got a little awkward at one point when she turned around and found out I was walking her home.
I know there are some people we say were dropped on their heads as babies. But there are others that were clearly thrown in the air, hit the ceiling fan, bounced off the wall & fell out the window.
If relationship breakups never existed, the music industry would go Bankrupt !
They say 1 in 3 people cheat in a relationship. I`m not sure if its my wife or my girlfriend.
Wow, I haven`t seen you since the last time I wish I hadn`t seen you
Goodnight, good people - and nite nite to the naughty ones too!
Surveys say 1 out of every 2 people suck at math. It`s terrible that 80% of the population can`t even do the easiest calculations.
I`ve accidentally swallowed a load of scrabble pieces.........My next poop could spell trouble.
As a future ghost, I`m kinda bummed out about the dress code.
It’s interesting how the ads on Youtube never have trouble buffering.
Why is it always the same person getting in your way from start to checkout at the grocery store?
I would want to change my name to `Nobody` on Facebook. So when someone updates something stupid it says `Nobody likes this`