Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
People treat New Year’s like some sort of life changing event. If your life sucks today, it’s probably still going to suck tomorrow ... Just sayin
The final stage of adulthood is when you start saying, "Oooh, that breeze feels nice."
Every time I get an eyelash in my eye, I`m reminded of how quickly I would die in the wild
Helpful Tip: Always remember to speak clearly when complimenting a woman`s boots...
Sometimes it’s funnier when you DON’T add “lol” at the end. lol
Tony Romo tried to throw his helmet down in frustration but it was intercepted and returned for a touchdown
Wow, I thought “flash mob” meant something completely different. Can someone come bail me out?
Fun: text a friend "Are you alone right now?" They go "Yes." Then u text back LOL
If I agreed with you we´d both be wrong.
You can make up any word you want in conversation and if you use it in a dilsationary way, people rarely question the meaning.
I keep having this dream that I`m being carried off by a giant squirrel. Does that make me nuts?
Their bedroom door is closed. I better walk in there for no reason. - kids
Is anyone else`s alcohol tolerance too high for their paycheck?
Head and Shoulders should make a body wash called Everything Else
If by cat person you mean I like to sleep all day and poo in sand then yes I am a cat person.