Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Next time you think life`s not fair..think of this x large clothes cost $2 more than large so why doesn`t small cost $2 less ? Being fat ....now that`s unfair
That microwavable meal was delicious and filling! – no one ever
ASKHOLE: A person who constantly ask for your advice, yet always does the opposite of what you told them
Nice try butter flavored pancake syrup, but I`m still putting butter on them!!
Everyday I’m shoveling. – Winter 2014
The first guy who bought pants had to go to the store without pants on, that`s just science
My life is just one long improvisation.
Please don’t mistake my personality for flirting. Just because I’m awesome doesn’t mean I like you.
There`s no mirrors in this self checkout?!?
Sometimes I just wish people were as easy to forget as PIN numbers.
I’m not a comedian. I don’t tell jokes. I just tell the truth in a way it sounds funny.
I`d like to read an obituary that says "He laid down the boogie and played that funky music till he died."
Donald Trump`s hair saw its shadow. We have six more weeks of protesting.
Happy 4/21! National work drug testing day!
Ironman and Batman`s only super powers is being super rich and smart really makes Bill Gates a real disappointment.