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The gym is like church to some people. No matter what they do all week, they think they can erase it with one visit.
I started seeing this girl recently. She sometimes texts. Sometimes Whatsapps. Sometimes she emails. Sometimes she Facebooks. Im getting mixed messages.
thinks that decaffeinated coffee is just useless brown water.
This status is dedicated to whatever you’re ignoring in real life to read it.
I`ve never said "in all seriousness" and actually meant it.
As long as there is an open textbook in front of you, nobody will question what you are doing on your laptop.
Why do people post pictures of missing people on facebook?...like we are going outside.
Some mornings I feel like leaving my coffee until its cold enough that I can just pour it directly into my eyes.
"I`m glad the weekends over" -Nobody ever
Some psychologists say that sleeping naked can help boost a person`s confidence, but nobody in this park seems to appreciate it.
Cats constantly look at you like you just asked them for a ride to the airport.
If you`ve never baked pot brownies in an Easy Bake Oven... then you`ve never wrote an apology letter to your sister with an Etch A Sketch.
It`s hard to trust people. Even the blind prefer to be guided by dogs.
Admit it, we’ve all hidden our favorite food from the rest of our family.
This bottle of beer is not only delicious,,,, It also contains almost 10% of my daily requirement of beer...