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My gift horse is facing the wrong way
dear journal..im now the coolest kid in school....mom:SWEETIE THE CHESSCLUB IS HERE 4 U!!!
Some will forget, the others are simply women.
The best time to reexamine your life is when you find yourself reluctantly nodding to the questions asked at the start of an infomercial.
Life is not fair. But life is not fair for everyone, which actually makes it fair.
With Halo 4, Black Ops II and Assasins Creed III, I think November might register the lowest teen pregnancy rates in a long time!
The first rule of Women`s fight club is don`t tell anyone what you`re mad about or why you`re fighting.
It’s almost 2015, I expect a toaster that pops the bread up in a less terrifying way.
Mashed potatoes really beg the question: “what else could we massively improve by squashing the hell out of it?”
When in darkness, pray. If you pray and nothing happens, I think it is the high time you paid your electricity bill.
Fantasy football is just Dungeons and Dragons for the people who used to beat up the people who played Dungeons and Dragons.
I think I`m the drunkest person at this bed bath and beyond.
everyone has that one crazy person in there family...but in my case everyone is just as crazy as i am!XD
When the coffee stops working it is probably the right time to start drinking.
People hiking with a giant stick never seem any better at hiking than the rest of us.