Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
I always read my wife`s Horoscope to see what kind of day I`M going to have...!!
You can`t fix STUPID, but you can Numb it with a 2x4.
Can anyone recommend a good movie to kinda listen to while I stare at my phone?
Some of you are so dumb, I don`t even know how you found the internet.
Do handjobs from girls who speak sign language count as blowjobs
You’d think that with as much time as women spend looking at their ass in the mirror they would be able to reverse into a parking spot.
Rabbits jump and they live for 8 years. Dogs run and they live for 15 years. Turtles do nothing and they live for 150 years. Lesson learned.
Girlfriend: You`re acting like a little kid. Me: What do mean, little kids can`t drink.
Touch my food and suffer the consequences.
It is a sad day when you go to all the trouble of getting a Frontal Lobotomy and no one notices.....................
For some people, a new year means a new chance to f*ck it up all over again.
If anyone ever tells you your dreams are silly, remember there’s some millionaire walking around who invented the Pool Noodle.
I never cry over spilt milk. But, beer? That sh!t`s totally different.
Facebook is a lot like a fridge. When you`re bored you keep opening and closing it every couple of minutes to see if there`s anything good, but nothing ever changes :b
BOOK FACT: If you took every book at Barnes and Noble and laid them end to end you get thrown out by security and banned from returning.