Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
I see your arguement contains a lot of swear words, you must really know what you`re talking about
Just remember, If we get caught you`re deaf and I don`t speak English.
Dating should be like buying a car... You should get to talk to the previous owners! SHOW ME THE MANFAX
I know they didn`t ask for it, but I sent a stool sample in with my tax returns.
It’s strange to think that the sound of nature is the sound of millions of animals desperately trying to get laid.
Dear YouTube, I will always “Skip this ad.”
The trouble with bucket seats is that, not everybody has the same size bucket.
When I go to the gas station I always get two kinds of drinks so it appears I actually have a friend..I think they`re catching on though.
Im 6`1", blue eyes, light brown hair, fit, own my own compa......oh crap, wrong website, sorry.
Game of Thrones is exciting, but I think it`s important to remember that these people are fighting over a chair
I sure do feel a whole lot more attractive at WalMart than I do at the gym.
I always put in a full eight hours at work. Spread out over the course of the week.
I don`t hate you, but I hope you fall in love and get married.
Sometimes I drive between lanes and pretend my car is Pacman gobbling up the dashed lines.
Honking your horn is fun but rolling down your window and screaming “honk” at people is just way more satisfying.