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If people are what they eat, some people must eat a lot of stupid.
You know it`s good advice, when your still confused afterwards.
If you knew what I considered to be my "best behavior" it`s doubtful you`d advise me to be "on it".
If I had a nickel for every time someone called me OCD I`d have 27 dollars and 15 cents.
there`s a fine line between "cocky" and "confidence"...and it just so happens I have perfect balance!
Why do people ask “What the hell were you thinking?” Obviously I was thinking I was going to get away with it and not have to explain it.
You can`t make someone love you. All you can do is stalk them & hope they panic & give in.
decided to burn lots of calories today so I set a fat kid on fire!
Every shape I had to learn above octagon was just a total fu*king waste of time.
Bring a hedgehog into the library and frantically ask the clerks where they keep the reverse spell casting books.
All my passwords are protected by amnesia.
Don`t call me names, you don`t know enough words to describe me
Sometimes I wish there was a `Build-a-Girlfriend`.
I broke up with my girlfriend by e-mail. I don`t know what upset her most, the fact that I did it by email or the fact that I cc`d my new girlfriend who wanted proof.