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Nothing is as scary as logging into Facebook and seeing someone you were secretly with last night has uploaded a new album.
If you like someone, pretend they`re a charger and you`re an iPhone on 1%. Run to them. Grab them. Plug them in. Wait, I lost the metaphor.
SCIENCE FACT: If you close your eyes, you won`t be able to see.
Offering someone food and secretly hoping they say no.
Watching movies alone sucks. There´s no one to ask, "What did he just say? Who is that guy?"
Guess what I saw today? ... Everything I looked at.
A touching letter by a little girl to Santa on Christmas: Dear Santa, Please give clothes to all those poor ladies in daddy`s laptop
Next time a guy asks for your number, write it down in Roman numerals. If he manages to call you, he`s a keeper.
I just came online to check the weather. That was 12 years ago.
Good Morning: You, my friends are the reason I wake up every morning ? LOL JK, I have to pee.
It`s always nice to be called Pretty in the morning. So what if he was hiding behind the trash wearing no pants.
“We don`t lick people!” - Lies adults tell kids
If there’s one thing that having kids will teach you, it’s home repair.
This could be the best day ever… but it isn’t. Again.
Since everything is closed for Thanksgiving I’m going to drive around and park in all the good spots I never get.